The Dana Street Saga

Life in Berkeley thirty years ago;
Searching for love and meaning

Thursday, June 14, 1973 - 9 AM

Dreams: Had a number of action filled and fast changing dreams last night. One had to do with Wendy, and was an elaboration of the situation last night where I offered to give her a ride home. In the dream, someone else, who had a BMW motorcycle, also offered her a ride, and I think she ended up going with him after some discussion of the situation.

The other dreams were later and unrelated. One was a wet dream. There was this huge black guy, with whom I was into arguing, and insulting each other for awhile. Until at one point we were up on a trapeze together, and all of a sudden the situation got sexual. I didn't seem to mind in the dream.

Another later dream seemed to be a long complex action film. In an early part, I moved into an apartment on the same floor but down the hall from Penny. There was vague interaction between her and me and others in the apartment building. There was a lot of random conflict without much cohesiveness. Later there was a lot of shooting between "us" and a bunch of other guys, sort of an old west showdown. It's all very vague. That's about all I can remember.

Last night, Andy had a bunch of people from his office over for dinner, including Wendy. As they were starting dinner, they didn't have any wine, and wanted some, so I volunteered to ride down and get some for them, which I did, and which they appreciated.

Later, when I was leaving the house, having nothing to do, they offered me some wine, which I accepted. Then we all went into the living room, where Andy and Wendy played their guitars and sang. It was a mellow scene.

Later, Wendy didn't have a ride home, so I offered to give her a ride on my motorcycle, which she later took me up on.

She lives on the Northside, but is leaving for a camp for most of the summer, and won't be living in the same place when she gets back.

Anyway, we were fairly reserved with each other, until we got to her house, where we hugged, and wished each other a good summer.

There was more left unsaid, and an unspoken warmth between us, so we hugged again, and I told her to come see me when she gets back. It occurred to me later that she'll probably be at our party this Saturday.

2:30 PM

Today I helped Mike move his stuff to his sister's house in Oakland. He'll be staying here a couple more days, however. I'll be sorry to see him leave, but he said he may come back to Berkeley in the Fall and try to find a job.

Then I visited Penny. Cici came home from her last day of school. She got all "excellent" on her report card (except "satisfactory" in P.E.) which is usual for her.

I walked up on campus, then back, playing some pinball on the way. Then I came home and am again at a loss as to what to do.

Might go to Anza, or to see if Jan wants to go for a motorcycle ride. But neither alternative excites me.

I called Jan last evening. She said she didn't think she'd hear from me again, after the way she was last Saturday. She said she was pretty drunk (which seems to be pretty much the norm for her). I like her as a friend, but don't have much energy for her, it seems, beyond this.

And I'm not really up for looking for someone new either, though I'd be happy if a miracle happened, but I'm not up for putting energy into the search, as I'm feeling pretty low and unlovable these days.

I increasingly rack my brain for ideas for something to do. The writing trip still might be a possibility. A story based on Cookie? Perhaps, but I don't know. Maybe I should try first for the practice with dialogue, etc.

Should finish that letter to Betsy also.

Friday, June 15, 1973 - 10 AM

I finished the letter to Betsy yesterday. Told her we (Cici and I) would plan on coming to Quogue in August for the reunion if nothing else comes up to change my plans.

After dinner, I went over to be with Cici until she went to bed about 10.

Then I came home, snorted some coke with Marty, Arlene, and Mike. They were going to Hard Times, and I decided to go too. Again, I didn't really feel anything from the coke.

I said I'd meet them over there, as I wanted to get ready and to phone Pam first. Tried to call Pam, but got no answer, so left for Hard Times.

Jan was there. I said hi, but didn't join their table 'til later. Athena came too, with a cute girl named Vohna, and another whose name I don't remember. Also, Chris, the girl who gave me a hard time that other night, was there, but though she was friendly, I was a bit cool with her.

A girl eyed me a few times, so I later talked and danced with her. She's fairly cute and sexy. Her name is Karen, she's 18, studying psychology and anthropology, lives on Panoramic Way, digs Erich Fromm. She wrote her phone number on my arm. She guessed I was 23. We rapped, about me mostly, for awhile. She left a little early.

Also met Laurie, who works in the T-shirt shop. She implied that Patti wouldn't be working there any more.

Today is sunny and nice. I'm thinking of calling Karen and inviting her on a motorcycle ride. I noticed last night that though she seemed friendly and enthusiastic towards me, she didn't respond particularly to my affectionate touches and caresses. Though she did kiss me at one point, and we hugged and kissed when she left.

After that I went back to Jan, danced with her, invited her home with me, but she declined nicely. I asked if we were still friends, and she said, "Of course," and wondered later why I asked. I said it was something about the vibes.

All in all it was a pretty good evening. Also, I invited Athena and her friends to our party, as well as Jan.

2:15 PM

Went to the bank. Came home. Walked up to campus. Saw Wendy. Sat with her a few minutes listening to music. Played some pinball on the way home.

Got a message that Tony and Caren were here, had dropped by, and were staying with someone named Reneé at 3024 College. Rode up there. Met Mark, the baker from Mendocino, and Ribette, but Tony and Caren weren't there, had gone swimming up at Strawberry Canyon, he said.

I stayed and rapped with Mark awhile, then came home. Saw Terri, the photo store girl, and waved. She looked very nice.

Oh yes, I forgot to write down my dreams this morning. I'd had one in which I was swimming in a lake or some body of water, and there was something about mining some clay. It's all vague and faded by now.

Also, I called Karen's number today. She wasn't home. I left my number. The guy said she'd be home after 5. Evidently she works days.

previous - next - - index - - - - I Ching

Start at the beginning?

Read the Preface?

If you'd like, you can leave me a comment in
my Guestbook.
Thanks.

If you recognize me or anyone else in this saga, I'd love to hear from you.

If you think this journal is a good read,
please CLIX me,
so others can find out about it too.

previous

next

index

Preface

Beginning

Cast

Latest Entries:
Waxing and Waning
Sneaking Out
Losing Marcy
Very High and Very Low
Anticipation

Go back to:
June 1972
July 1972
Aug 1972
Sept 1972
Oct 1972
Nov 1972
Dec 1972
Jan 1973
Feb 1973
Mar 1973
Apr 1973
May 1973
June 1973
July 1973
Aug 1973
Sept 1973
Oct 1973
Nov 1973
Dec 1973
Jan 1974
Feb 1974
Mar 1974
Apr 1974
May 1974

Began Jungian Analysis here, and ended it here

For more complete
I Ching commentary.